My Random Thoughts Today

1. One full day of cartoons can make you feel like you're losing IQ points.

2. If you kill two bugs that you see mating, are there any karmic repercussions?

3. Why can't I take chances in life like I do in computerized Farkle?

4. No one tells you that after the age of 30, ice cream may no longer like you, even if you like it more than ever.

5. No matter how much I love the rainy weather, consistently yucky weather is wearing on the soul. That...is the main reason I never moved to Seattle.

6. How can 9 year old boys take longer and hotter showers than their mother, who has four times as much hair to wash and condition and has to shave her legs?

7. Emotions are a funny thing...and often come out of nowhere.

8. I'm realizing things I wanted 10, 11, even 12 years ago...are nowhere close to things I want now.

9. Having only boys as your children is quite remarkable. When you're not feeling well, one will draw you flowers and the other will jump all over you.

10. Romance equals effort.

My 9 Year Old's Christmas List

In order to get a head start on Christmas shopping, I had T, my 9 year old son, sit down and make out his Christmas list. Considering I don't remember in the slightest what I wanted for Christmas when I was 9, his list is pretty impressive especially since he put some pretty practical things on it.

1. Nerf N-Strike Vulcan EBF-25 with tripod



2. LEGO Indian Jones Xbox 360 game


3. New play shoes
(I, the cool mom, am thinking about these...)



4. HALO3 ODST


(Because of the mature rating...this is something we'll have to think about.)

5. A cell phone
(I seriously do not think so.)

6. A new pair of biking gloves.

7. The Beatles, Rock Band.



8.The Universe (the whole series)



9. Electronic Toss Across


10. My own ATV

(I personally think this is awesome as all get out, but considering we don't have the land for this...it's just not feasible.)

11. Just Kidding by Andy Griffiths.





Added by Mom

12. Goosebumps Series by R.L. Stine



13. MP3 Player



14. Digital Camera

What I Love About Today

Top Ten Things I Love About Today

1. I had the chance to run in the quiet mist of the morning.
2. Cooler air is moving in on this new fall day.
3. It's officially fall! Even though I absolutely love the summer, fall brings so many things that summer just can't.
4. My goal skirt...fits in the waist finally, but my legs have refined into bulk muscle to a point where it's a bit too tight to walk in.
5. I'm 4 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight before my second son, and in the best darn shape of my life.
6. I've fallen in love with a couple of songs that I can't get out of my head. Thank you, Lady Antebellum.
7. I realized that I have made some of the most awesome friends via the internet.
8. I also realized that without internet (mainly through Facebook, thank you) I would have never reconnected with many people that I thought I had lost forever or had never truly found before.
9. I love the fact that I have a job that I'm darn good at, and I still have it, despite this rollercoaster economy.
10. I have a great family, and I love the fact that I've helped them be great!

The Muno Birthday Cake Test

This past weekend I crossed over from a bakery cake consumer to a home cake maker. The process was fairly easy with a minor hiccup (whipped frosting), all in an effort to make my youngest son a Muno birthday cake for his Yo Gabba Gabba birthday party. Here is the final outcome.It was a hit, only one piece left. Guess that triple chocolate fudge cake was hard to resist. :)

The First of Many New Blogs

I originally had this blog as a private "vent", say whatever kind of blog. Around my birthday a couple of weeks ago, I realized I needed change, and the best way to get change is to make it yourself. So, I have adopted a "positive" outlook. Not just an optimistic view, but an active mental participation on making myself happier. I read "Happiness From the Inside Out" by Robert Mack. I've applied some of the things he wrote about in his book. I've made decisions solely based on whether it will bring me happiness. Now, you may chuckle and ask, "how hard can it be to make yourself happy?" To someone who, over the years, has become a naturally critical and pessimistic person...it's a difficult challenge. Therefore, changes have been made and the changes are for the better. I exercise...daily, no excuses. I do have rest days, but they are not routine. I do hobbies and events for me and only me. I play soccer; I scrapbook; I read, I take long baths, I learn. Whatever gives me happiness. Yes, it may sounds as if I am becoming selfish, and in a way, I am. My boys and my husband see the new happiness in me and in turn, they are happy. Therefore, our happiness makes a large circle feeding off the happiness we make and the happiness we receive.

My Husband, the Blogger

My husband has officially joined the blogging community. He is actually quite good at it, especially since he's writing about his one true love, the only love I have to compete with, music. He's having so much fun, and I am glad for him, eveh though we now have to compete for "quiet computer time" a.k.a., blogging and computer research without kids in our laps or kids yelling or fighting right beside us as we are trying to be brilliant. Yet, we will manage. :)

In honor of him joining the throngs of the online writers, I dedicate this post solely to him and his blog. Subpar is a blog dedicated to the rare and often forgotten music that I have rarely heard or not prefer to hear. Read more below.

!!!Warning!!!
SUB-PAR: Not measuring up to traditional standards of performance, value, or production. Music available from this Blog, the U.S. Government does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any information, apparatus, product, or process disclosed. The music on this blog is intended for review purposes and should not be seen as a substitute for the original, legal product. Support your Artist and Musicians by Purchasing Music if you like it.

So, have fun, you guys and remember support your music by purchasing, not pirating!

A Dreamer's Heartbreak

I always used to pride myself on the fact that I was a dreamer, living with expectations of things that could happen. I guess you could say I was actually an optimist at one time. But the life of this dreamer has led to nothing but heartbreak. No, I'm not talking about the romance kind of heartbreak. Heartbreak when you realize that your dreams have just put your expectations of life way too high. Heartbreak that you realize that you're not the person who can conquer the world, or the city or hell, even some days your own home. Heartbreak when you realize that plans are made to be broken, expecting leads to disappointment, and dreams are just something to keep your mind entertained when you're not busy with something else. Heartbreak when you realize that the adult version of you is nothing like the person you know you should be, but you don't know how you got there or what to do to change. Heartbreak when the fun, creative, smiling woman that you once were is now hidden away in some shell that functions through your everyday life. Heartbreak is knowing that you have to pretend your happiness so the significant people in your life will stay, when all you want to do is just "be".

I keep being told "don't give up", "just hang on", etc., etc. When are people going to realize I am exhausted, and the fingernails I've been hanging on by are ready to break. I've had one dream come true in the last 7.5 years. If the fact that dream wasn't my youngest son, I'd be highly disappointed. Yet, my boys are my reasons. They are the reasons I endure this heartbreak, disappointment, anger, and loneliness. They are the reasons I try somehow to make things better everyday for them. They are the reasons I hide my tears in the streams of the shower, in the pockets of my pillows, and in the words I never speak.